This job might be a little personal, but I’m okay with that. Somebody has to do it!
Bank of America
As an experienced professional, provide advice to client management with regard to moderately complex security issues. Assists in the review, development, testing and implementation of security plans, products and control techniques. Coordinates the reporting data security incidents. Provides technical support to the client and management and staff in risk assessments and implementation of appropriate data security procedures and products.
Must have experience and be very proficient with the common tools associated with penetration testing.
Must demonstrate knowledge of tactics, techniques and procedures associated with malicious insider activity, organized crime/fraud groups and both state and non-state sponsored threat actors.
Must be able to critically examine an organization and system through the perspective of a threat actor and articulate risk in clear, precise terms.
Suzi's Cover Letter:
I am confident I am the right girl for this job! I’m good at picking out passwords. They usually have something to do with bubblegum or lip gloss and a bunch of numbers and symbols. And I’m an expert at control. And that’s what you’re looking for. Like, if a guy is trying to get hot and heavy too fast, I put the brakes on. I’ll make him wait a whole week before he gets to see my boobs, then a whole month before he gets to touch the cookie jar! I squeeze his junk hard to make him realize that I am the one in control of stuff.
Also, I’m the best at penetration testing. I could tell you everything in the Adam & Eve catalogue! I’m familiar with all the adult toys, and I like the au natural sausage, too! When it comes to figuring out malicious stuff, I’m like an expert. My sister had this one boyfriend who was a total toolbag. I told her he was and she didn’t listen and when he bleached all her clothes before he dumped her, who was right? Me! That’s just evil to ruin a girl’s clothes.
And since I’ve done some acting, I can totally pretend to be a threat. I’ll get all up in someone’s face like I’m from South Central! You’ll be shaking in your boots!
Thanks for considering me,
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I'm just your average girl who wants a kick-ass life and... love! If I could be a superhero, that would be AWESOME! I'm currently a "phone actress" looking for a really cool career. Don't get me wrong-- I love giving a hand to dudes who need someone to chat with. Everybody needs somebody! But, my parents keep telling me I need a respectable job. Sigh.