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Bust My Butt

2/1/2019

 
If you’ve got money to burn and no pride, you can spend it on this Bubble Wrap Suit Zoltan Costume from the movie “Dude, Where’s My Car”?
​
Picture

Yes, it’s made of real bubble wrap. I love popping bubble wrap. Can’t resist. So let’s say you drop the $24.95 from What On Earth on this bad boy. And then you get drunk and inevitably sweat inside this plastic death trap? You’re gonna stink. And slip, and slide. And your dumbass friends are going to pop you. Not in the fun, let’s-knock-da-boots, kind of way. But actually pop you. To me, this is not worth the $24.95. Because if I drop my dining-out budget on this suit, I need to get a couple of wears out of it. Also, I’m sure I could make this myself for a fraction of the cost. With some of the over-packing Amazon does, I’ve got enough bubble wrap for a wedding gown.

Pfft.
​
Then, there’s this:

Picture

Pillow soft? Like My Pillow? Or what pillow exactly? Also, do the foil stripes come with each pair of panties, or am I totally out of the panty loop? That’s gonna be some jacked-up tan lines. Or perhaps she’s treating herself like she’d treat a baking pie—putting foil over the crust so you don’t want it to burn. Or is this some nouveau jogger fashion? Instead of jogging in my reflective vest, I’ve got a reflective ass…
​
That’s all the random thoughts I have… for now…


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