Silk. Just the sound of the word sounds nice and sexy… and expensive. Guess those silkworms have great agents because $338 for a silk dress is a lot. Somebody famous was spotted wearing the above dress from designer Hale Bob. We’re not a fan of silk dresses. We’d need full body Spanx because silk clings. To everything. Plus, there’s no boob support. As always, we want you to not spend like a star when you’re working at Dollar General. So, here’s a cute alternative: A cute, satin dress from Tobi. Plus, this model looks way happier wearing it. And it’s on sale for $54. You’re saving over $200. Which means you could buy 200 items before tax at the dollar store. If you were so inclined to purchase in that way. P.S. Are we the only ones thinking Hale-Bopp—as in comet—when referring to Hale Bop clothing? Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. We can’t knock any fashion for a good cause. So, we’re going to have to put the snark away for this one. HARTZGLOVES is manufacturing a special pair of pink gloves to benefit Susan G. Komen. Deidre Goodwin is the CEO of HALTZGLOVES. She started the light-up gloves company after she was nearly struck by a car while directing traffic. Her gloves can be seen for 1,250 linear feet and are used by various police departments, crossing guards, and others looking for safety. In addition, breast cancer has touched Goodwin’s life. "My mom's best friend passed away from breast cancer. My parents stepped in to assist with the care of her children. It is hard to believe that 20 years later we are still talking about breast cancer. Millions have been affected by breast cancer and I want to change that. I am so honored to know that HALTZGLOVES can have a part in finding a cure." You can pre-order your pair now and help in “Bringing a HALTZ to Breast Cancer.” For each pair of pink gloves sold, $5 will be donated to Susan G. Komen. Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. The fact that The Rolling Stones are still relevant is amazing. They’ve spanned multi-generations by being damned good and inventive. The band, along with Bravado, have teamed up with Bergdorf Goodman for a limited-run multi-brand retail experience. Now through August 13th, you can shop this collection at Bergdorf Goodman on 5th Avenue in New York City. Here's the collab 411: Artipoppe, the fashion forward high-end baby carrier brand, will feature custom limited- edition Rolling Stones carriers. Away, the global travel brand known for creating luggage for the modern traveler, will feature a selection of their classic polycarbonate Carry-Ons customizable with hand-painted artwork, inspired by the NO FILTER TOUR. Customization available during the following dates/times: 8/3-4: 12-4pm 8/10-11: 12-4pm Bird, the founder of the shared e-scooter micro-mobility movement that encourages clean, car-free alternatives, will offer the first ever limited-edition custom Rolling Stones inspired scooter for sale Bravado Collection, a coordinated collection of apparel and novelties, will offer unique treatment variations of the tongue that have not been seen before, at accessible price points. The Cactus Plant Flea Market apparel capsule will bring thefluid and eccentric combination of type and playful graphic imagery, from the elusive designer Cynthia Lu. CASETiFY, the leading tech accessory brand loved by millions, best known for the slimmest military grade iPhone case, bridges the gap between protection and fashionable cases with a limited-edition Rolling Stones collection of iPhone Cases and Apple Watch Bands. Chrome Hearts, the LA-based, family-run luxury accessories and lifestyle brand, known for their exquisite hand-craftsmanship and work with leather and silver, will bring back some of their limited-edition Rolling Stones pieces. Edward Bess, the master of lip color, will incorporate the iconic tongue to the simple, sexy and sleek packaging of his larger than life lipstick - Big Kiss. Laduree, the ultimate French Maison, will deliver macarons featuring the Stones logo in custom packaging, fresh daily Midnight Studios, Shane Gonzales' streetwear brand with a cult like following, will deliver a Rolling Stones apparel capsule that combines his signature punk and youth street styles in an anti-aesthetic manner. Moleskine will feature Rolling Stones versions of their smartly designed vintage inspired notebooks. YETI, theAustin-based leading premium outdoor brand, will offer top of the line branded beverage ware and coolers for an elevated tailgate experience, perfect for the No Filter tour, primarily held at NFL stadiums. If you can’t make it, keep your eye out online for a little re-sale action. Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. We get it—designers are all ethereal, and cutting-edge, and… weird. We’ve got the weird covered, but we don’t have the juice to design bullsh*t clothing that no one would buy. No real-world person, that is. Mission accomplished, Thom Browne. Everyone’s mouth-gaped-open at your Spring 2020 collection that fuses Marie Antoinette, and rich-people sports. Check this out: WTF is this!?!? How bad is life that you need a cod piece? And this dude looks miserable, like: “I should’ve gotten that degree in basketweaving.” Cod pieces best be left to rock stars and celebrities. Like Larry Blackmon of Cameo. NOTE: This is how you wear a cod piece. Make that thang stand out instead of Thom Browne’s “let’s blend it all together.” Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. Actor Jeremy Piven is cool. Right? He doesn’t seem like a total d-bag. So, we suppose dudes are likely to follow his fashion cue? Do guys even do that? The Piv-ster was photogged wearing a cool-looking striped tee from Mercy & Loyal. We’d show you the image, but it’s all copyrighted, blah, blah, blah. Here’s the shirt: FYI: Piven did not have this soft-man look with the floppy hair and the “who farted?” face. He wore his shirt with jeans, and a white cropped denim jacket and gold chain. The later two items are on the wanna-be-Jersey-Shore list, but that’s not the point of this tale. The point is: this designer shirt is $75. This Italian-imported sweat-catcher is $75!!! This is a way better option: Men—save your money. This tee is also striped. It’s also cool. And Old Navy is selling it for $7! It’s soft-washed! Plus, this guy looks like he knows how to have fun. He looks like he has a job and a gf. The other dude still lives with his parents. Be the Old Navy-fun-guy-with-a-life and save your money. Then you can buy your own gf. Wha!?!? Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. We understand the concept that jewelry has value. Because gold and diamonds and gems are commodities. We might own a precious piece or two, but our main jewelry finds are those of the Charming Charlie kind—and we’re proud of it! But for those with sophisticated tastes, you’ll be happy to hear that celebrity jewelry designer Tara Familglietti has launched a new collection ONDYN. The 30-pieces range from earrings, rings, bracelets, and necklaces and celebrates your sleek elegance. (Definitely doesn’t apply to us!) The pieces drape like second skin (Hello, Silence of the Lambs), taking shape on the body and “sending diamonds literally in motion. We’re in motion, alright, from passing out from the price tag. These earrings are the cheapest, at $595. There’s no wonder Familglietti is the “jewelry designer to the stars”. They’re the ones with all that “eff you” money. For us, ONDYN stands for: Oh No Dude You’re Nuts Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. This is cool. Harley-Davidson has teamed with Bravado for a special collection of Rolling Stones apparel. The clothing will be sold at Harley-Davidson dealerships worldwide and online. The limited-offering collection features styles focused on key areas of The Rolling Stones’ music and career stages with a spirit of personal freedom. The collection encompasses 58 styles for men, women and youth. Pick-and-choose from three designer capsules: Modern Mashups, Tour/On the Road, and Bootlegis. Harley-Davidson gear has always been tres chic. Now, tres chicer. Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. Just when you thought Crocs couldn’t get more ridiculous (because their mere existence is ridiculous)—they have. Crocs teamed up with Japanese company Beams to create: Crocs with fanny packs. That’s a one-two bad fashion punch. And they’re just $54 a pair! What is the deal with plastic shoes?!? People swear they’re comfortable, but all we can imagine is sweaty, slippery, stanky feet. Guess the fanny packs will come in handy to hold some fungus cream… #HardPass Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial.
We admit it. We are complete ignoramuses when it comes to fashion designers. It’s because we don’t have the kind of jack required to be designer-ed up, nor the desire. So when we saw what this collection was priced at, we shouted: “What the f&ck!?!?”
Rich people would be richer if they wouldn’t drop $6,985 on a Burgundy Chrysants Flower Robe from Charlene Tang. This robe is made-to-order and takes seven-to-14 days to construct. Still doesn’t justify a robe we’d sit around and get Froot Loops crumbs on. Want pajamas? Get ready to drop nearly $4,000—because thetop and pants are separately priced. Again, custom-made. Blah, blah, blah. Mom made all our clothes from those McCall’s Patterns. Yes, we got picked on. But we learned how to punch, and we had money for college. Boom! We can afford Tang (do they even still make that stuff?) We’ll spend money on something tangy because we like a little zing. Suppose the only tang this Tang benefits is the kind a man can buy with a fat wallet…
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We’re just gonna drop this here: No doubt this chick is smokin’ hot. No doubt we’d look like an extra-large silk pillow. But we seriously thought this was a robe. Because the first time we saw this dress, a Victoria’s Secret model was wearing it to a store event and so we thought V.S. was selling it. Nope. Thank Hello Molly for this number. The dress, named Talking to You has received 5-star reviews from satisfied customers. But the consensus is, you need some large melon-action to make this work. The vote around the office is we’re torn about this dress. But we did come up with this... Crack Wise randos: We’re blaming Hefner for this one. Dude wore his robe 24/7. Aren’t you going to slide off your seat? One good wind gust and we’re seeing your womb. What exactly are you saying? Like what you read here? Click on the HOME page and subscribe today to unlock premium, members-only content—some of which you won’t find any place else on the internet! Start with your FREE 10-day trial. |
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