Of pork...
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​Bacon. For. Life. We got some intel from this company called ButcherBox. Their PR peeps were all excited about their Black Friday promotion. Blah, blah, blah. We didn’t give two strips, because our eyes were focused on the large banner at the top of their website:

FREE BACON FOR LIFE

As a member of ButcherBox, you’ll get a free pack of bacon with every order. Forget Bubba Gump Shrimp Company. We’re rattling off in our heads all the ways we can enjoy bacon.

Plus, “ButcherBox bacon is uncured and free of added sugar and nitrates. It’s legit the best bacon ever! We promise you’ll love it.”

You know how Lady Gaga wore that meat suit? Well… we might’ve already figured out what our Halloween costume will be for next year.

Bacon!
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Many of us turn to food comfort when we've been dumped, in particular-- ice cream. Usually a half-gallon. So, Nora's Non-Dairy out of Quebec is ingenious. They've devised break-up ice cream! Like, you can gift your soon-to-be-ex with ice cream to soften the blow. 
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Some flavors include:
Bye Bye Brownie
Strawberries and Your Mean
It's Just Vanilla
 
Dumpers fill-in-the-blank of the soon-to-be-dumped, and then sign their dumper name. Perfect.

We're conflicted. And that's the beautiful part of this whole thing. We want to scratch your eyes out and push you in front of a moving bus for dumping us, but you're a somewhat kind soul for giving us ice cream. Sigh...
 
Thank goodness Crack Wise isn't in charge of naming break-up ice cream flavors. Ours would include:
 
His is Bigger Than Yours Double-Dark Chocolate
You Fart Too Much Chunky Monkey
Too Nag-y Raspberry Swirl
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For years, we believed cranberries were shaped like a can. We weren’t even sure what food group they belonged to. As a result, we’re not the biggest fans of food in a jar. You know, salad in a jar. Cookie mix in a jar. Overnight oatmeal in a jar.

But this. This is pretty cool. The Watergate Hotel’s Kingbird Restaurant has crafted Thanksgiving dinner (or leftovers) in a jar.
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​Too bad we already have plans. But, we can put our leftovers in a jar and tote them to work!

Chef Santoro’s Thanksgiving jar feast includes croissant stuffing featuring bacon and chestnuts, and roasted carrots with honey and cardamom. Those tasty sides complement the turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, and cranberry sauce with pecans.

If you’re in the area, you can snag a jar through November 24th. Price tag: $60, but it serves two to four people. 

It’s officially “limited edition” time, meaning you only have a few short weeks to stuff yourselves full of holiday-themed/flavored treats. So, here ya go:

Haagen-Dazs Peppermint Bark Ice Cream

Gingerbread Man Peeps
Skinny Pop Gingerbread Cookie Popcorn/Skinny Pop White Chocolate Peppermint
Starbucks Cookie Straws/Starbucks Peppermint Mocha Drink
Peppermint Bark Oreo Cookies
Oreo Candy Canes
Elf Pillsbury Sugar Cookies
Cinnamon Coca-Cola
Talenti Old World Eggnog Gelato
M&M’s Hot Cocoa Candies
Planters Holiday Nut Crunch
Nestle Toll House Lumps of Coal
Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch Cereial
Utz Holiday Shaped Pretzels
Pepperidge Farm Peppermint Milano Slices
Blue Bell Peppermint Bark Ice Cream
Dum Dums Holiday Pops
Lara Bar Gingerbread
 
Hopefully, Santa will bring us a Planet Fitness membership… 

Hershey’s is our BFF. They know when we need them. And they know how to keep our relationship fun—by coming out with a new flavor!

For the first time since Candy Cane Kisses in 2008, Hershey’s brings us: Hot Cocoa Kisses!
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May we suggest our own special drink recipe?

Crack Wise Hot Chocolate
1 cup of prepared hot chocolate
Coconut rum
Hershey’s Hot Cocoa Kisses
 
Do this:
Prepare a cup of hot chocolate however you do it. Pour in some coconut rum (more or less depending on how the day went). Stir. Throw a bunch of Hot Cocoa Kisses on top. Draaank!
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It’s no secret we like to stuff our faces. Life is short. At the end of your time hear on planet Earth, are you going to look back and say: “I’m so glad I ate a ton of quinoa. There’s a special place in Heaven for me.” Or would you rather say, “Yes, Jesus. I ate all the bacon cheeseburgers I could because you invented them and they are so good and I wanted to be close to you.”

The latter of course.

But… when there are times, and there will be, that you feel “guilty” about all that “not healthy-for-you stuff that you eat”, then turn to ChocZero.
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Next month, the brand is launching a Peppermint flavor of its best-selling Keto Bark. Just in time for the holidays!

ChocZero is gluten free, soy free, and sugar alcohol free. They use an exclusive monk fruit formula to make a line of products with no added sugar.

Guess we’ll have to give these a try. So is it bad if we eat the whole bag to determine if they’re delicious? Wouldn’t that be counter-productive? And worst yet… what if we become a monk because we at these!?!?!
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Ick. We don't look good in orange... but becoming this kind of monk is okay with us...

Are you all about ZAHTAR? If you’re not, you’re not a cool foodie.

WTH is ZAHTAR? Also known as: Za’tar, Zatar, Zaa’tar, and Zahatar, (is this spice a rapper or what?) Zahtar is a collection of spices featured in Mediterranean and Middle Eastern cuisine. Base ingredients include hyssop, sesame seeds, oregano, marjoram, and salt.

Bam!

Here’s whyZAHTAR is so tastefully trendy:

It’s versatile. Use it as a dry rub… on meats, not on yourself. Throw a pinch of it into stews, soups, marinades and breads. Sprinkle it over veggies, hummus, or eggs.

It’s good for you! Full of antioxidants and antibacterial and antifungal properties, ZAHTAR is considered “brain food.” (Could this cure athlete’s foot? If chicks can use SOS pads to remove callouses on their feet…)

ZAHTAR has an aromatic, earthy, warm flavor.

Here. Make this ZAHTAR dish.
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2 large sweet potatoes, peeled and sliced into wedges

3 Tbsp avocado oil

3 tsp Zahtar

1 Tbsp honey

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and set aside. Place sweet potato wedges in a mixing bowl. Pour 2 Tbsp oil and 2 tsp Zahtar over and coat the potatoes well. Reserve the rest of the oil and Zahtar for the dressing.

Place potatoes on baking sheet and roast for 40 minutes. Meanwhile, mix together the remaining oil, Zahtar and honey in a bowl. Drizzle over warm potatoes before serving.

*recipe courtesy of Shoshie Steinhart of KosherMoms

ZAHTAR sounds like “sitar” to us. And why the ALL CAPS. Is this spice pushy and in your face? Or will ZAHTAR breath hit someone like a ton of bricks?

What to do with all that leftover Halloween candy…. You could just have a bingefest, or you could be patient and have a drunkfest.

Say what?

What makes most anything even better? When it’s infused with booze!

CandyStore.com must be a long-lost relative, because they know what it’s all about—making grown-folk happy.

Candy + vodka = shhhhh, don’t talk so loud

The basic recipe is this:

Pour candy into a glass container with a lid, like a mason jar.

Pour vodka on top of candy, covering it.

Seal container and let sit for at least 24 hours. Best wait a week, though.

Get more tips and recipes HERE.

You’re welcome.
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