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How Bizarre

12/11/2018

 
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As we’re getting set to close the books on an interesting 2018, we thought we’d share with you the year’s most bizarre travel stories. So if you hate traveling, this will reconfirm why. Our favorite nightmares involve those involving animals in the airport. And we don’t mean a&&hole business folk who think they’re more important than the rest of us.

In January, Ventiko (a performance artist) tried to hop on a United Airlines flight from Newark to L.A. with her emotional support peacock named Dexter. (Perhaps it’s the only cock she fancies!) She bought an extra seat for Dexter, but was warned numerous times that since Dexter wasn’t a human nor approved support animal, that he would not be allowed to fly. After pleading her case for three hours after arriving at the terminal, Vendumbko decided to drive cross-country. Guess she put in some quality time with her cock.

Meanwhile, one traveler tried to board a Frontier Airlines flight from Orlando to Cleveland with her emotional support squirrel. We love squirrels, but please. They aren’t an emotional support animal just because you’re emotionally attached! Airline officials told the woman their policy does not permit rodents on the plane, but she refused to depart the plane. So, police had to help her off. Thanks for the two hour delay.

Crack Wise Bizarre Travel Story:
It was many moons ago, and we were on the way to a haunted attraction in a small town in the middle of nowhere. On our way, we got lost. And that’s when we saw a mother-flippin’ pygmy on the side of the road. Just standing there! It was tiny, and pink-skinned. And no, we weren’t intoxicated! Just ask comedian Mike Conley—he can verify this traumatizing event. 

We were scurred.

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