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CRACK WISE MAG

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​Explore always-relevant tidbits of funformation in our archives...

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Wiped

4/27/2020

 
This endangered species is make a comeback: the napkin.

We thought millennials killed napkins with their frugality and multi-purpose thoughts of using paper towels-as-napkins-tissues-bathing-suits mantra.

But mind you, it’s the fancy paper napkin that’s all the rage. The limited edition fancy paper napkin.
​

hudsonest
is a New York City-based company that wants to help you up your napkin game at home, at the office, or at an event. Limited edition napkins come in three sizes: dinner, cocktail, and guest towel, and are available on a one-time or subscription basis.

New designs are released four times a year.

We feel weird about fancy paper napkins. They’re not as “soft” as the plain white ones, and the thought of dropping $10 for a handful of cocktail napkins ain’t our jam—because we’re slobs and require a lot of cleanup.
​
But you do your fancy napkin you. We’ll just stand here all jealous of you…

Vartual

4/20/2020

 
​If you’re missing “Sip & Paint” night, you can socially-distance and still have fun with friends—virtually—with Cupixel. (Or have fun with your quarantined family at home.)
​
Picture

Cupixel is a premium art box that uses a special mobile app to create a unique painting experience that’s both relaxing and easy. Users download the app, which serves as a personal artist assistant of sorts. The app guides you through the process of creating a work of art by using a method that guarantees the finished product is worthy of framing and displaying. Choose from the Cupixel gallery, or upload a photo of your own to paint and frame. 
​

​Cupixel kits start at $69.99. 

Padded

4/13/2020

 
We have a cooktop stove. We love the sleek look, yet hate the cleaning process. Apparently, Doris did, too.

Doris is a homemaker and mother from Germany. She realized the need for a simple product for hassle-free cleanliness. There’s nothing worse than when food splashes on the range top and hardens. Of course, we do get a workout in trying to get the crud off, but…

Doris Range Pads are made of heavy duty, high-temperature silicon. Place them directly on the burner, and get ready to use your free time to clean the oven.
Picture

The pads can withstand up to 480 degrees Fahrenheit, arranged in any pattern, and cleanup with soap and water. They’re dishwasher safe, and stick resistant. And they come in a variety of colors.

It’s like a cooktop condom…

Crapbury

4/6/2020

 
We’re stunned. We thought everyone shared our sentiment that Peeps are the Devil’s spawn. So when CandyStore.com hit us with the news that Cadbury Creme Eggs are ranked as the Worst Easter Candy? Mind. Blown.
​

​The reason for the rankest ranking? The chocolate shell. It’s too hard to bite into without making a mess. That means crème all over your hands. And not in a fun way…

So what is the reigning Easter candy champ? Cadbury Mini Eggs. We admit—we’re fans!

Crack Wise suggests that you acquire a bunch of different Easter candies, and have your family determine what’s best and what’s not. 

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