While coronavirus has our attention, you are aware that we are surrounded by germs 24/7? Perhaps we need to be a bit more vigilant/borderline Howard Hughes and protect ourselves.
Did you know that our feet, palms, and forearms are where germs like to congregate the most? We know. Gag.
That's where NakeFit steps in. These revolutionary adhesive pads protect your feet from dirt and germs-- from your yoga class, to the gym's showers-- while still allowing for that feeling of being barefoot.
Kinda cool. Plus, it'll cut down on us having a Crack Wise intern carry us around all the time so we won't get foot germs... JK. That would be so Mariah.
You’re a filthy liar. And we might be, too. We fib in school. We fib to our partners. We fib to our doctors.
We may be grown, but we don’t want to hear nothing from our doctor about how we’re doin’ life. TermLife2Go did a little survey, and found that we lie about our habits to our docs.
The older we get, the more likely we are to lie. Patients 35 and older were more likely to lie about their exercise habits than younger patients. Guess younger people don’t care, or they think they can make up for bad habits later. (You can’t. It all comes back to haunt you!)
So, basically, stop lying. We never want scolded, but we need to be honest when it comes to our health. So we can live longer to lie more. What?
Nobody wants to talk about the... butt scope. But since butt issues aren't just an old person's thing anymore, let's get down to business. Colon cancer is one of the most preventable cancers, and has a 90% five-year survival rate when found in its early stages.
MDsave doesn't want to hear your excuses. They have #truth all day long.
Six Colonoscopy Myths, Dubunked
Excuse #1: I heard colonoscopies are painful.
The Truth: Today, most colonoscopies are performed under sedation, and most of the time, you won’t even remember the procedure.
Crack Wise-dom: It's not any worse than the reaming you get at work, no?
Excuse #2: I don’t know if I can handle the prep.
The Truth: The bowel cleanse to prepare for a colonoscopy is easier now than it’s ever been. Instead of drinking a gallon of prep in one go, there are now half-gallon options. Some doctors will also order a split dose, so you can drink half the night before your procedure and half in the morning.
Crack Wise-dom: When you say you "give a shit", you'll actually mean it. A lot.
Excuse #3: I don’t have a family history of colon cancer, so I’m not at risk.
The Truth: 1 in 18 Americans are diagnosed with colon cancer. Some risk factors mean you should talk to your doctor about getting screened sooner, including Irritable Bowel Syndrome (e.g., Crohn’s disease or Ulcerative Colitis) or Lynch Syndrome.
Crack Wise-dom: Don't be stupid.
Excuse #4: I’m too young to get colon cancer.
The Truth: While rates of colon cancer are falling in the 50+ crowd, they’re on the rise in young adults. Researchers speculate that higher rates of obesity may be a factor. To reduce your risk, keep your weight in a healthy range and ask about any colon cancer or other risk factors in your family. Talk to your doctor if you experience any of these symptoms: Rectal bleeding, changes in stool color or size, change in bowel habits, colon or rectal pain.
Crack Wise-dom: You're never too young to be stupid.
Excuse #5: I can’t afford a colonoscopy.
The Truth: There are solutions out there like MDsave. Their pre-negotiated rates are about 40-60% lower than the national average cost, with trusted local doctors across the country. A colonoscopy National Average Price: $3,772. MDsave Average Price: $1,647.
Crack Wise-dom: You can't afford groceries and gas, either, so...
Excuse #6: It’s easier to just send my stool in the mail
The Truth: Agreeing to that cheaper, easier DNA screening for colorectal cancer can cost consumers much more in the end. Because if that test comes back positive, some insurers and Medicare stop coverage as a preventive service towards a colonoscopy that your doctor will inevitably order next.
Crack Wise-dom: This is not what "What can brown do for you?" means.
While we’ve made a lot of progress, there is still some stigma surrounding anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, ADHD and more. So, let’s make this new year one of a new outlook.
Dr. Vinay Saranga is a psychiatrist and founder of Saranga Comprehensive Psychiatry. He says there are nine myths surrounding mental issues:
Mental illness isn’t real: According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, approximately 1 in 5 adults in the U.S.—43.8 million, or 18.5%—experiences mental illness in a given year. Mental illness is very real and is accompanied by many uncomfortable and debilitating symptoms.
Mental illness only occurs in weak people: Mental illness can happen to anyone. It’s not about how smart or strong you are. It’s usually a result of an imbalance of certain brain chemicals, is hereditary, due to your environment or in response to specific life events and circumstances.
You can ‘just get over it:’ Telling someone with anxiety or depression to “snap out of it” or “just get over it” is one of the worst things you can say. It diminishes the severity and seriousness of the condition, makes it sound like you don’t believe what they are going through, and knocks down their self-esteem.
Anxiety is just nerves: Anxiety disorders are the most common psychiatric conditions and include OCD, panic disorder, PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder. Sometimes anxiety is in response to a specific set of circumstances that are quickly addressed and resolved. Other times, anxiety can become a real psychiatric condition that must be addressed for a lifetime.
Depression is just a bad case of the blues: Depression involves much more than just feeling sad. It’s a serious psychiatric condition that leaves the sufferer feeling tired, hopeless, at a higher risk of suicide, problems with appetite, feeling guilty, loss of self-worth and aches and pain.
Stress is not a big deal: Life is chaotic and all the craziness usually manifests itself as stress. Unfortunately, many people play this off as nothing to worry about. Stress is a very big deal and can lead to heart disease, high blood pressure and more. Learning to deal with stress is important for your mental and physical health
Antidepressants and antianxiety meds are handed out like candy: The truth is, many general practitioners and family doctors write too many prescriptions for psychiatric medications instead of referring their patients to a psychiatrist. Nonetheless, these medications are a lifesaver for people who are truly suffering from anxiety and depression.
My ADHD is kicking in: Joking about ADHD is not funny. We’ve seen a spike in the diagnoses of ADHD in recent times, many times an incorrect diagnosis at that. ADHD is a real neurodevelopmental disorder that occurs in children, young adults and can go on into adulthood.
My OCD is kicking in: OCD is often used to describe someone who is super organized, a neat freak or checks things over and over again. The truth is, OCD is a real anxiety disorder that severely interrupts a person’s ability to function unless certain rituals or sequences are followed.
So… let’s stop judging each other, and instead support each other. Who couldn’t use a friend?
WTF with all the STDs?
According to the CDC, combined cases of syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia (the three most commonly reported STDs) reached an all-time high in the U.S. in 2018.
Mycoplasma genitalium (MG or Mgen) is the most-reported STD. Uh.... we've gotta go look that one up............................................................................................ It's a small and pathogenic bacterium that lives on the skin cells of the urinary and genital tracts in humans... resistant to multiple antibiotics... #letsblamechina
According to the chart, the most cases are in rural America... #blamethesheep
A 326% increase in cases involving gonorrhea in men? #blamethesheep
Those over the age of 40 are the ones who should know better, but apparently don't. #blameyourself
Stop acting like some jacked-up mad-doctor-villain from a James Bond movie by diagnosing your "illness". Get the PlushCare app, and get answers from real professionals.
Over a third of us have been guilty of WebMD-ing and then freaking out, thinking we have some kind of condition. With PlushCare, you can book an appointment 24/7 on your smartphone (or computer), chat with a doctor, and pick up prescriptions at your pharmacy. Without insurance, your appointment is a flat rate of $99: with insurance, fork over your co-pay.
No more thinking you're dying from Fragamylomia.
With Coronavirus, and colds, and sinus “stuff” and… whatever waiting to invade our bodies out there, there’s got to be something we can do to alleviate the symptoms, or stop them from getting I-need-my-mommy-I-think-I’m-gonna-die worse.
Dr. Suhyun An is an expert on regenerative medicine, so she might be knowledgeable in the healing ways. To prevent your sick symptoms from reaching critical mass, she recommends these natural remedies:
Vitamin C: Some studies indicate that Vitamin C can shorten the lifespan of a cold and boost your immune system. “The best way to get it is through your diet; the fresher the food, the better,” Dr. An says. “Oranges, limes, lemons, grapefruits, leafy greens, and bell peppers are all good sources of vitamin C. Be careful with supplements because they can lead to upset stomach and kidney stones.”
Honey: Honey has natural antiviral and antimicrobial properties. “Drinking honey in tea with lemon can ease sore throat pain,” Dr. An says. “Research suggests that honey is an effective cough suppressant, too. Honey often contains Clostridium bacteria, so never give honey to a child younger than 1-year-old because infants’ immune systems aren’t able to fight them off.”
Chicken soup: This popular cold and flu remedy helps because hot liquids reduce mucus buildup and keep you hydrated. “Chicken soup, in particular, has anti-inflammatory properties, which help reduce a cold’s unpleasant side effects,” Dr. An says. “Keep some in the freezer or even canned for flu season. It’s quick to prepare that way and soothing to eat.”
Aromas: “When you have congestion from the flu, applying camphor or menthol salve around your nose can help break up mucus,” Dr. An says. “Aromatherapy oils, such as peppermint and eucalyptus, can have a similar effect. Also, vapor rub can reduce cold symptoms, especially in children older than 2 years. It helps open air passages to combat congestion, reduce coughing, and improve sleep.”
Probiotics: These are friendly bacteria and yeast found in the body, some foods, and supplements. “They can help keep your gut and immune system healthy, and they may reduce your chance of getting sick with an upper respiratory infection,” Dr. An says. “For a delicious and nutritious source of helpful bacteria, include probiotic yogurt in your diet.”
Well, the Crack Wise Staff is taking things one step further with remedies and beverage pairings. Because we know stuff, too...
Vitamin C dropped in a cup of coffee spiked with Bailey’s will make you perky and healthy.
Honey. Ever heard of Barenjager? It’s Jagermeister Honey Liqueur. And it’s Uh. May. Zing.
Chicken Soup: with a glass of Johnny Walker on the rocks. Mmmm Mmmm drunk.
Aromas: Have you sniffed Ouzo? Take a whiff then down a shot… or two. Because we’re doing “pairings” here. We guarantee you can breathe well after two shots.
Probiotics: Sure, have that probiotic yogurt. Infused with berries that were soaked in vodka.
Take whichever tips you feel comfortable with to get through the rest of the nasty nasty season.
With a new year almost here, one must know what the new trend is for 2020 when it comes to cosmetic surgery.
New York City board-certified plastic surgeon Dr. Oren Tepper believes it’s the:
That’s because he’s the co-founder of LipSync, which takes into account a person’s face, lips mouth, and smile as a whole to give someone an all-over younger look. The real novelty with this innovative collaboration is that plastic surgeons are now understanding dentistry (and the importance of partnering) and dentists are understanding what's possible with plastic surgery. Changing lip position and architecture can not only make patients look younger but can significantly impact the goals of aesthetic dentistry.
We’re intrigued. Perhaps Santa can stuff our stocking with some phat bills so we can give this a try.
The young folk call their girlfriends a squad. Dudes call their bros a posse. The wealthy have an entourage, and the spiritually evolved have “tribes”. Who knew?
If you gals want to gather your tribe, try luring them (for what?) with the Sacred Woman Gathering Kit. No. It’s not a trail of chocolate leading to an entrapping net.
It’s a kit for hosting your own Sacred Woman Gathering—made by women, by hand in L.A.
The love-and-intention-filled box includes:
A hand sculpted goddess
Ceramic tray with a Palo Santo bundle
Talking stick made from driftwood collected on Whidbey Island (we are not mature enough to deal with “talking sticks” and “wood”.)
Hand poured soy candle with clear quartz and lightly scented with
Essential oils of cedar and sweet orange
Selenite tower (made by mama Earth)
Instructional booklet (with a beautiful cover image painted by a female artist, @yogaandartjourney)
Surely, you have $149 to gift some tribe leader with this, no?
Finally. A workout that speaks to me like the f8cking trucker that lives in my sh*tbag soul: 6 Weeks of THE WORK by Beachbody. A program that capitalizes on recent research that shows that swearing during your workout can help increase pain tolerance, power, and strength output.
We’ve been cussing this for years—which is why we don’t work out with others. But now… game changer!
This program was created by Amoila Cesar—top trainer to NBA players and celebrities. You know, people with good bodies who don’t eat Snickers and Oreos for breakfast. Those people.
All we know is that we’re treating ourselves to a f&cking treat after this workout, d*mnit!
Haus of V is a creative collective that shares a similar mindset -- with a twist.