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Suzi sPEAKS

Just an average girl looking for her dream gig. Hit me up at: speakssuzi@gmail.com

    JOIN THE FUNFORMATION MOVEMENT! 

    ​And don't worry. We won't spam you or sell your info. We don't have that kind of time... or motivation. 
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Rock Out With Your...

11/1/2018

 
​I’m fun and I love music! And look how much money I can make part time! Do you know how much Purell I can buy!?!?
DJ/MC for Gentleman’s Club
$50,000 - $60,000 a year
​
Experienced DJ/MC preferred for Upscale Club in NYC (Experienced Preferred but will train someone that can prove dedication and show potential in the first interview)

REQUIREMENTS
Saturday Sunday 11-8

Monday Tuesday or Thursday 10-8

Must have clean hard drive with actual Music

Must be able to work under pressure

Outgoing/friendly/upbeat Personality

MC Skills must be as if you hit the powerball
​
Bring something else to this great organization (outside the box)

Suzi's Cover Letter:

Fo shizzle, my nizzle, I’m the dope gal for ya!

Let me set the scene about my potential. I will walk into my interview with my entourage (two bitches), glow sticks, boombox, and drop a phat beat.

“Yo, I’m Wonton Rapper, lemme flow my resume to y’all. Word.”

Then, I break out in my rap like Nicki Minaj would. Cool, right?

I’m really deadicated to whatever I do. Back in highschool, I was really not good at giving BJs, so I practiced every day on a banana, and voila—I’m the best! My older man friends buy me jewelry all the time. See? Dedication pays.

I’m really good under pressure, too. I had this fat-ass boyfriend who weighed, like, a ton. So being under him was not easy. But I managed. I didn’t suffocate!

I’m friendly, happy and love to make people smile. And, if you want something outside the box—I’m a baton twirler. That would look bad ass in da club!

Call me any time for an interview!
Suzi


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    Author

    I'm just your average girl who wants a kick-ass life and... love! If I could be a superhero, that would be AWESOME! I'm currently a "phone actress" looking for a really cool career. Don't get me wrong-- I love giving a hand to dudes who need someone to chat with. Everybody needs somebody! But, my parents keep telling me I need a respectable job.  Sigh.

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