One of Florida’s most beloved species is in danger. No, we’re not talking about a senior citizen with puffy hair driving a hoveround looking for the Early Bird Special.
We’re talking about the manatee.
Save the Manatee Club is hoping we’ll join in the effort to keep our ocean friends safe and happy. We can do that by adopting a manatee.
OMG. This is the best thing ever. Because we can care for Manny the Manatee without having to care for a manatee. Our bathtub isn’t big enough.
Cue the Sally Struthers tear-jerk sell: For just $25 you’ll receive an adoption certificate with full-color photo and bio of a real Florida manatee, a membership handbook, the official newsletter, and free shipping of all this stuff.
P.S. We want to see a manatee sitting on Sally’s lap…
It’s nearly trick-or-treat time, bitches. This country loves its Halloween candy. According to our friends at CandyStore.com, we’re gonna drop $2.6 billion on Halloween candy this year.
A majority of us won’t be buying candy corn. That demon has taken the Worst Halloween Candy crown away from Circus peanuts—an equally vile creation.
Americans love Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. They’re a favorite anytime of the year—not just Halloween.
Check out what your state loves the most:
Here are some other facts to share with your favorite Halloweeners while shoving candy in your candyhole:
P.S. Let's trick-or-treat in Oregon!
We are in the heart of Oktoberfest. It’s that time of year when everyone is German—eating warm potato salad, drinking beer, and dancing around to some themed music like a fool.
WalletHub likes to give us the facts straight-up, so we can celebrate in the best way possible. For its Best Places for Oktoberfest intel, they compared the 100 largest cities across 24 key metrics, ranging from share of German population to number of beer gardens per capita, to the average price for Oktoberfest celebration tickets to determine where the best places to hang.
The Big Apple is tops, followed by Denver and Portland.
Some fun facts to drop between bites of schnitzel:
510,000+: The number of whole roast chickens eaten, plus 60,000 sausages and 59,000 pork knuckles.
1.98 million: The number of gallons of beer consumed during Oktoberfest.
$5,000: The estimated cost for an American to attend Oktoberfest in Munich, Germany.
Check out this map to see how Oktoberfest-y your city gets…
You've got through the first Sunday in October to celebrate...
Summer. Long days filled with carefree fun. Labor Day. The end of fun, and the beginning of grumpiness for some.
Dr. Alok Trivedi is a psychological performance and human behavior expert, founder of the Aligned Performance Institute, and author of the book Chasing Success. (Well, isn’t he all that!) He wants to help us to get focused and finish 2019 strong.
(We here at Crack Wise have our own goals…)
Have something to look forward to: The most successful people always have something to look forward to that keeps them grounded and moving forward. Maybe it’s a ski vacation this winter. Maybe it’s the annual family get together in the mountains. Perhaps it’s an upcoming cruise. Having something that you are genuinely excited about in the near future is a great motivator.
Crack Wise-dom: We’re motivated to eat an entire pot roast and hibernate until Spring.
Find the fulfilment: If you are not finding fulfilment in your work, it is time to find a different career path. The most successful people in any field usually love what they do and it doesn’t even feel like work to them. If you are genuinely unenthralled in what you are doing every single day, find something else.
Crack Wise-dom: We’re passionate about adult coloring books. How does that translate?
Think of the money: It’s not selfish to be focused on money like some people believe. Money is a wonderful motivator and we need it to survive and to have life experiences. Money shouldn’t be your only reason for working hard, but it is definitely a driving factor in the equation and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Crack Wise-dom: If we were a few years younger, we’d use our assets to find a “Sugar Parent.”
One thing at a time: One of the biggest problems many people face is becoming overwhelmed. From our careers to our families, one of the biggest complaints of most people is feeling like they don’t have enough time in the day. While you might feel like multitasking is the best solution, the best way to get control of your time is to focus on and solve one problem before moving on to the next.
Crack Wise-dom: We’re still trying to figure out our all-in-one remote…
Make time for yourself: Even with our busy lives, you must make time for yourself every day. Even just 30 minutes to disconnect from the world around you and do something that you really enjoy is extremely important to your mental well-being. It can be a hobby, exercising, vegging out on the couch, meditating, people watching or whatever it is that helps you feel relaxed and recharged.
Crack Wise-dom: Vegging out? We could’ve earned a Doctorate in that…
Don’t procrastinate: When something comes your way, it might be tempting to put it off until closer to the deadline and think of all the fun you had in the summer. Unfortunately, this usually leads to cramming, stress and a loss of quality. Do things as soon as you can because life always has a way of throwing unexpected surprises our way. Procrastination is a bad habit that takes away from productivity and results.
Crack Wise-dom: Right after we fold this fitted sheet…
Get around people you like: The most popular business advice is to get around people more successful than you so you can learn from them. More importantly, you need to get around people you truly have a genuine affection for in both your professional and personal life. When you are around people you like, you are happier, less anxious and depressed, and your life feels naturally aligned.
Crack Wise-dom: Our Funko Pops never judge…
Have more fun: Now that summer is over, most people dread going to work just like a lot of kids don’t look forward to being in school. Find ways to incorporate more fun into your life. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money and can be something as simple as playing a game you like or having a deep conversation on a topic close to your heart. Everyone needs to have fun in their life or they are missing the point of living.
Crack Wise-dom: Who’s up for a round of Cards Against Humanity?
Go hug a tree. Really. Or at least go outside and enjoy nature. It seemed that when we were kids, we couldn’t wait to get out of the house and explore. But as adulting happens, outdoor-ing only occurs while driving to obligations.
According to a new study, only 26% of Americans spend free time in nature several times a week. And 16 % say they never do.
No wonder Mother Nature can be so cranky…
The Outdoor Power Equipment Institute (OPEI) has an official spokesdog named TurfMutt. He “paws it forward” by helping kids and their families learn about the benefits of their family yard and taking care of the green spaces around them. TurfMutt has some tricks and tips for getting a dose of vitamin N(ature) in under 10 minutes.
Play with your dog. A dog’s favorite “room” of the house is your family yard. Take inspiration from your pooch and spend a few minutes outside playing Frisbee or fetch.
Crack Wise-dom: Can we borrow someone’s dog?
Take a walk. Lace up your athletic shoes and head out for a walk around the block or to your neighborhood park. While you’re out, commit to turning off your cell phone and enjoying the natural setting around you (it’s just 10 minutes, after all!).
Crack Wise-dom: We’re not in the best of shape. Perhaps you’ll give us a pass and let us leave the phone on? In case of emergency…
Get your kids moving. A rousing game of tag or hide and seek in the family yard is a great way to counter computer and screen time.
Crack Wise-dom: Hide in the best spot ever and you’ll get some quite time away from those children.
Clean up your outdoor living room. Make simple work of yard chores by breaking them up into smaller chunks. Ten minutes is enough time to put a serious dent in weeding a flower bed, sweeping off the back patio, or picking up debris from your lawn.
Crack Wise-dom: Or put your kids, or someone else’s kids to work. Isn’t that their purpose?
Dine al fresco. Taking a meal outside is one of the easiest – and most nourishing – ways to enjoy the outdoor space around you. Have breakfast with the backyard birds. Lunch at a park near your office. Enjoy your coffee break under a shade tree.
Crack Wise-dom: We’ll pass. We once had a bird crap on our food…
Meet outside. Fresh air can be a catalyst for fresh ideas, so take your next brainstorming session for work outdoors. Need to have a heart-to-heart with your child? Scientists have discovered that communication between parents and children is more connected when conducted outside.
Crack Wise-dom: Perfect. So if our date takes a wrong turn, we can run. Two birds, one stone!
Sit back and relax. Sometimes the best thing to do is absolutely nothing at all. Spend some time in a hammock, spread a blanket out on the grass, or take a meditation break outside to soak up the nature around you.
Crack Wise-dom: Until you wake up with some sketchy character snuggling you…
P.S. We usually wouldn’t take advice from a character named TuffMutt, but since we’re a sucker for dogs…
Conspiracy theorists and royal watchers may enjoy this read: Diana: Case Solved. The Definitive Account that Proves What Really Happened by Dylan Howard with Colin McLaren.
It's a moment that remains frozen in history. When the Mercedes carrying Diana, Princess of Wales, spun fatally out of control in the Pont de l’Alma tunnel in Paris in August 1997, the world was shocked by what appeared to be a terrible accident.
But two decades later, the circumstances surrounding what really happened that night—and, crucially, why it happened—remained a mystery.
The book finally (allegedly) answers the two questions that investigators have been scratching their heads over: Why was Diana being driven in a car previously written off as a death trap? And who was really behind the wheel of the mysterious white Fiat at the scene of the crash?
So, get the book and get the scoop!
When you’re crushing on a celeb, you hope to meet them in person. Make-A-Wish recently facilitated the wish of 16-year-old Emily—who has kidney disease. Her dream was to meet Keanu Reeves. Mom Deborah said Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure is one of Emily’s favorite movies, “She came across it one day and was instantly hooked.”
Plus, Emily appreciates Keanu’s personality and all his movies.
Emily met her man on the set of Bill & Ted Face the Music, filming in Louisiana. She got to ask him questions, get autographs, have lunch with him and the crew—and got to watch a scene being filmed.
Mom Deborah said, “It was an unbelievable day. She hasn’t been this happy in months! Keanu seemed to be having as much fun with Emily as she was with him.”
Brown-bagging it is so last century. Seriously. Those bags are just trashing up the environment.
Whether you’re a tree hugger or not, eco-friendly lunch accessories are the pizza bomb! Keep Cool has launched a new sustainable bag brand for Target called Out of the Woods. Whether it’s back-to-school or a desire to be the office envy, these three new must-have designs are the answer to consumer demand for products that are more environmentally-friendly and ethically-centered. That’s nice and all, but we think the designs are cool.
These styles all feature Supernatural Paper—a renewable, lightweight material derived from paper that matches the strength and aesthetics of leather while being 100% animal free. They’re even washable!
Crack Wise-ing: We don’t feel our lunch is worthy enough of such awesomeness. A pb&j with a side of pickles and barbecue potato chips sounds more like a leftover-plastic-shopping bag kind of thing. We feel like we need to eat salmon and quinoa in order to use these bags…
All three styles are priced at $11.99.
Babies’ cute little tushies are just so precious! And their skin is delicate and needs the utmost care.
Huggies has introduced Huggies Special Delivery—the softest diaper with plant-based materials designed to provide comfort without compromise.
These diapers feature a baby-sided liner and waistband made with fibers derived from plant-based materials such as sugarcane for superior absorption and fit. They’re free of parabens, fragrance, and elemental chlorine—and are dermatologically tested and clinically proven hypoallergenic.
Huggies Special Delivery are available in sizes Newborn through Size 6.
Get your baby’s booty off on the right foot. There are plenty of adult years to be booty-rude.
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The beach. The sand. The water. The beverages. For us, this is the ultimate escape. We’ve always been fascinated with those who can surf. Because we cannot. And will not. Because we have the klutz gene. Which means—ultimate injury. There is a huge 10-day everything-surf event happening in North Carolina starting this weekend.
Perhaps we can merely be observers at the 14th Annual O’Neill/Sweetwater Pro-Am Surf Fest in Wrightsville Beach. The two-day event August 16th-18th attracts 200 pros and amateurs from Florida to Rhode Island. There will be longboard and shortboard competitions, along with the new extreme surfing with the Red Bull Tow-At.
On Saturday, you can keep dry on solid ground with the Music and Art Fest, combining local musicians, arts, crafts, and family activities. Proceeds will benefit non-profit organizations Hope From Helen and Surf Club.
Monday the 19th is dedicated to Surfers Healing—an organization dedicated to enriching the lives of those with autism by exposing them to the experience of surfing.
And from the 23-25th, don’t miss the 7th Annual Wrightsville Beach Wahine Classic—open to lady surfers of all ages.
With surfing now a part of the 2020 Olympic Games, maybe we could… nope. That whole klutz thing…
We’ll wait for an Olympic competition involving surfing channels…
Haus of V is a creative collective that shares a similar mindset -- with a twist.